January 2005
By Shabina S. Khatri
Want to hear a funny thing? Money can’t buy happiness. It’s a truth that Islam has always taught us, but one that culture helps us to forget. Still, there’s only so much we can ignore, and these days, even science has something to say about this issue.
Two psychology professors recently conducted an exhaustive analysis of 150 studies on wealth and happiness. The result? In many countries, “although economic output has risen steeply over the past decades, there has been no rise in life satisfaction … and there has been a substantial increase in depression and distrust.”
In short: more money, more problems.
Wow. It gets better.
When asked to rank overall satisfaction on a scale of 1 to 7 (where 1 means “not at all satisfied with my life” and 7 means “completely satisfied”), America’s richest 400 people averaged about a 5.8. That’s pretty high, but the interesting thing is, Kenyan cattle herders also averaged a 5.8 — and they live in dung huts with no electricity or running water.
From these findings and our own experiences, it should be easy to accept that happiness is not all about the cars we drive, the houses we live in, or the clothes we wear. Rather, life satisfaction is about, as the psychologists concluded, belonging to civic groups, seeking personal fulfillment and understanding the meaning of life. Since Islam has given us all of that, we Muslims should be some of the happiest people on earth, right?
Hmm. Don’t everybody answer at once. I know what you might be thinking: How can our Ummah be happy, given the downtrodden condition of so many Muslims around the world?
But is that why you personally are unhappy? Or is that an excuse we as a well-to-do community in North America use to stay sad? If anything, the suffering of people around the world should force us to analyze our own situations. Analyze and appreciate, rather than falling into the trap of wanting more, more, more.
According to the study, “once a nation reaches a certain level of prosperity, further economic growth is unlikely to buy additional happiness.” So what will? Gratitude, for one thing. Allah (SWT) says in Surah Luqman, “Be grateful to Allah. And whoever is grateful, he is only grateful for his own soul; and whoever is ungrateful, then surely Allah is Self-sufficient, Praised.” (31:12)
Expressing gratitude, then, is a choice, just like practicing forgiveness. Allah (SWT) tells us that we have everything to gain from making such a choice, and that He has nothing to lose. How to apply this great advice?
We’ve all encountered frustrating situations — frantic schedules, fights with loved ones, trouble at work/school — but notice that it is only the grateful servant who comes out of these hardships unscathed and wiser than before. That’s because obstacles give us the blessing of perspective.
As human beings, we tend to measure success by comparing ourselves to others, but we forget that the trick is in the measuring stick. When a wise person is in trouble, he conducts what is called a “downward social comparison,” contrasting his situation to that of someone less fortunate than him. Let’s face it, there are plenty of brothers and sisters around the world with whom we could conduct such a comparison. And no matter how bad we think we have it, nobody has endured as much hardship as the Prophet (SAW) and his companions (R).
So if you want to feel better about your problems, stop yourself for a moment and try focusing on all the blessings you’ve been taking for granted. Reflecting on even the most basic things — clean air to breathe, for example, or fresh food to eat — can help diminish any dilemma that’s been festering in your mind and make it much easier to deal with.
Gratitude can help our spirits even when we’re not going through any specific hardships. Many American Muslims tend to feel depressed for no apparent reason. Such dispiritedness could be a sign of weak imaan or a hard heart, both of which can be assuaged by counting life’s little blessings.
The best part about adopting such an attitude is that we become closer to Allah (SWT), and farther away from the transience of this world, which makes it easier for us to deal when things go wrong.
Finally, Allah (SWT) tells us in the Qur’an, “No person knows what he will earn tomorrow, nor does any person know in what land he will die.’ (31:34) That means our Creator has already determined our provisions, and no amount of whining will help us to attain more than our allocated share. The best way to lead a happy life, then — as I’m sure the Kenyan cattle herders will tell you — is to stop stressing so much about what we want, and start being grateful for what we get.
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